I used to be 192 lbs.
Here's the proof.
It may not be the worst picture you have ever seen but, it was my worst.
5 years of self defeating behavior.
Drinking 6 nights a week. I would of done 7 but I always ran out of money.
Living on muffins, coffee and deep fried food.
Many bad relationships with "friends".
Dating men that were so fucking bad for my mental health.
It took me 1.5 years to lose those 40 lbs.
I'm still working on treating myself better and working through self sabotage.
Losing the weight and emotional damage cannot be solved by a quick fix.
Every damn day I tried to be consistently acting in a loving way for myself and reminding myself why I wanted to lose the weight and get healthy. AND what having achieved the goal of it would do for me.
... I was sick of hiding in my own skin.
... I was sick of not feeling confident.
... I was sick of mistreating myself because I was feeling worthless.
... I was ready to push myself and grow.
... I was always sick. Literally. And bloated.
... I was down punishing myself for all the bad shit I had experienced in my relationships, family life and childhood.
I had enough.
I didn't need that to be all I was anymore. It wasn't my identity.
I was enough. I am enough as I am.
I've learned that the weight I lost was more about the emotional burden I was letting take over my life. I was always unconscious and feeling like a victim of circumstance instead of wanting to be awake for it all.
I thought that the fat burners, low fat / low cal diets, working out for endless hours, etc could help me feel better. It didn't. It resulted in damage to my body and mind.
The only thing that really worked ... I dealt with my shit. I got coached. We dug into my self sabotage, traumas, where I was holding myself back and how I could move forward when it all seemed hopeless and frustrating.
I promise, stick with it.
You'll get there.
P.S. I would love to learn more about your story and help you reconnect with what is possible for you. Book in for a complimentary call here to learn about working together.
#loveyourself #bodylove #gratitude